Happiness Experiment

Excerpt from Good Housekeeping...

My twinge of nostalgia for those premarital days was triggered by the arrival in my mailbox of a book called Happiness for Two: 75 Secrets for Finding More Joy Together. The sender was an editor friend who thought I'd make good use of it. The author was Alexandra Stoddard, an interior designer and author of dozens of books on "the art of living well." A self-proclaimed pioneer of the happiness movement, Stoddard spreads the word — literally — at "Happiness Weekends," where she lectures on how to find joy, bliss, and, for a little change of pace, color coordination.

A quick glance at the book's table of contents revealed three of her main themes:

1. Improve yourself. (Hence "secrets" like "Read some quality literature.")
2. Be considerate. (E.g., "Mess up, clean up" and "Sincerely say you're sorry.")
3. Do things à deux. ("Explore together your invisible wealth," "Read together"...and, just to drive home the point, "When you are together, be together.")

I'd read only three pages, and I was altogether ready to scorn Stoddard's neo-Victorian idea of a harmonious marriage. Any adult in need of reminders like "Don't correct each other in public" would be better off with a marriage counselor.

That said, some of the suggestions weren't as easy to scoff at. So I read on, and after cutting out the trite, irrelevant, and useless, I whittled down her list of 75 to 10:

1. Write each other's New Year's resolutions. This intrigued me. It was a bit early for resolutions, but we could certainly make a wish list of what we would each like the other to accomplish. If written, prods weren't nags.
2. Begin each encounter with a smile. So quaint, but there was hard research that smiling does improve outlook.
3. It feels good to look good. An opportunity to get Steve to wear nice clothes for a change, and not his ragged favorites.
4. Write love notes. As mentioned, we used to send beautiful, hilarious e-mails to each other. I wanted to revive our epistolary connection.
5. Give the gift of eye contact. We both had the bad habit of staring at the TV or computer screen when we talked.
6. Grumpiness is contagious. Being more mindful of mood could ward off secondhand blues.
7. Try not to interrupt. Stoddard meant bothering a partner during his alone time, but interruptions in conversation were also a problem for us (me).
8. Generous compliments lighten the heart. He was fairly reticent with the flattery. I wouldn't mind more of it.
9. Control your tone. Sometimes, I could be as obnoxious as a 16-year-old prom princess. For his part, Steve could be a tad condescending.
10. Celebrate more. We lavished gifts and parties on our daughters, but Steve and I downplayed our own birthdays and accomplishments. Making a big deal of little things could add excitement to our lives.

To view the article in its entirety, visit Good Housekeeping.

In Rememberance

Go Palin Go!

I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your health, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way

- Meredith Brooks, Bitch

Watermelon II

I previously blogged about the health benefits of eating watermelon at the beginning of the summer. It appears we have even more reason to enjoy a slice - it "has a Viagra - like effect on the body's..."

When Doug reads this blog he will think I am making this up. When he reads this report from Science News, he is going to think I've been tricking him into getting busy with all the watermelon I've been feeding him. Of course, I have only been thinking of his heart.

Lycopene in red melons is higher than than that found in tomatoes or red grapefruit. Apparently, lycopene relaxes blood vessels. So does Viagra. For a real good dose, you have to eat the rind since that's the part of the melon with the highest concentration of this nutrient. Don't worry, they are working on a new breed so we don't have to eat the nasty stuff. OHI is validated - they sometimes only juice the rind and give that to you.

It is known that the body is better at absorbing lycopene in tomatoes when it is consume with oily vegetables such as spinach or avocado. Dr Patil thinks watermelon in a salad is a hard sell. He may be right, a blog search nets only one such salad in the first few Google pages. However, watermelon is finding its way into gourmet restaurants. I located a Watermelon, Avocado and Arugula salad, which I would prefer to the spinach. There's Watermelon, Avocado and Tequila soup, not exactly a Margarita but what the heck. The one I liked best was a salad with Seared Tuna, Watermelon, Avocado and Grapefruit. Another recipe called for shrimp and shallots with the watermelon and avocado, watercress too.


It is my humble opinion that people seem to put together things in recipes that work best for the body. The French bistros have made salads of grapefruit and avocado for a long time and Mexicans have their guacamole. In the name of better health (and more nookie), I made the following salad...

Watermelon And Avocado Salad

1/8th watermelon or 1-2 cups, cut in chunks
1/2 ripe avocado, cut in chunks, s & p to taste
1 green onion, sliced-green parts only
4-6 leaves, basil, mint or combo of both, chopped
2 oz goat cheese, or substitute with feta, crumbled
Pistachios or sunflower seeds, chopped

Mix all ingredients. Serve with your favorite balsamic or red wine vinegar and oil dressing.

For a dressing, I pureed some watermelon with lemon juice and poured that over the salad with a sprinkle of almond oil.